Monday, May 30, 2011

Centuries Passed

I felt sick about getting dropped two weekends in a row. So I decided to do two +century rides in a row. Saturday was about 104 miles and Sunday was about 102 miles. This Memorial Day weekend worked out to be the perfect way for me to ride them with the actual Memorial Day off for rest, recovery, and a little relaxation. A teammate told me to not let the setback get to me and I agree - to a degree.

I realized that I must live with the set-backs as much as I have to live with any successes.
My mom had food waiting after my 102.5mile ride, Sunday. Thanks, Mom!
I want the very best out of myself and I know that I need to be better. I know how I say that... "I need to be better." But it's how I feel. I really feel like I have potential that only my mind says I cannot achieve. I don't care about the level of competition I am up against. I don't care that there are cyclists that will always be better than me. I know that and I am a realist. I just cannot allow myself to find any satisfaction in losing so terribly. I need to be better. I demand it.

I purchased a new wheelset this past week and I am hoping they come in before next weekend so I can get them properly made up and try them out in a race situation.
Ritchey WCS Apex Carbon 50mm Tubulars
I'm not about to ride trying to look serious and not actually be serious. I can't stand the blokes who have all sorts of money to blow on the nicest gear, only to have those heavy wallets seemingly slide them off the back on any sort of climb. I will not be that man. Though, the econ minor in me is telling me to make note of the fact that in order for such a nice tubular wheelset to be available for a poor fellow like me, there needs to be consumers that can buy the more expensive stuff (good cyclists or not) to create that demand and perpetuate that trickle-down effect of quality products for cheaper (what I can afford).

I am serious about my commitment to cycling and it does not just mean I will buy better gear, equipment, or any junk expecting I will be any better. I am the engine. I am the driving force. I must make myself suffer and pull out of it to improve myself and go where I want to - nothing else will.

I am hoping to find a job for my post-summer life that will hopefully at least lead to somewhere I want to take my personal life. You all should know how I feel about moving back at home. There are pros and cons and I really need to watch myself in this adjustment/transitional period. I should really be a more appreciative tenant (note the free food up there... and the opportunity to even think about purchasing that wheelset).

Anyway, I am eager to get my resume updated and sent out to those potential employers. I am demanding just as much out of my personal/work life as I am my cycling. Only I can take me where I want to go.

Satisfaction is a fleeting companion. I know there will always be better cyclists and more for me to achieve - I cannot stop. I am inspired by other people on and off the bike. There is more I want to say, but I need sleep and you don't need to read about it now.

Thanks for reading, friends.

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